Dear Katie

littlemepic_zpsdbc2c404

This post is multi-faceted, it’s part link up and part wise words Wednesday.

Little Miss Katie,

Where do I even begin? You are silly and stuck in a very small little world, and so much will change in the next 18 years.

You will eventually understand multiplication, and eventually you will realize you are incredibly gifted.  You will squander it, but you should know it is never cool or cute to play dumb. Live up to your potential.

Your family will change.  Things will be very hard, a slew of people will come in and out of your life, some for the better and some for the worse.  Do not question yourself about the decisions the people, especially the adults, around you make.  Your parents love you, they always will, but they are human too and they have issues far beyond your youthful understanding.

Dad will die. I wish desperately this could change, but it never will.   Cherish the time with him, listen to what he says, do not make out in the backseat of the car while he kindly drives you on your “dates”. But also speak up, tell him your opinion about his life and choices, you are exactly like him and sometimes you will be the only one he listens to.

Love Mom and AC unconditionally, they are your everything. Be silly with them.  Make your own traditions. Cry, hug, fight, do all those normal family things, but know they are special people.

You live in a bubble and the world is SOO much larger. There is more to the world than your neighborhood, or Baltimore, and especially more than your Catholic School bubble. You will be awkward, you will have difficulties with your friends, you will make questionable decisions about boys.  You are human.

In college, enjoy it.  Join the sorority.  Make those friends. Experience Philly. Try not to have a ridiculous 19th birthday. Go to the AEPi formal with that guy you don’t know.  Spoiler Alert: He is THE ONE.

You will find your real friends have been with you all along, basically your whole life.

Most importantly, ask for help. Unfortunately, things sometimes really will be harder for you than other people.  There will come a very overwhelming point in your life. Ask. For. Help. Admit you are wrong, ask for forgiveness, and do not give up.

Also, you will become Jewish. You will one day get those pets you begged for. You will win awards and accolades.  You will never be the hippest dresser, nor will you ever really figure out how to do your hair. You will be really great at caring about other people, and you will find a way to make that into a career. You will have an unnatural love for Harry Potter.

One day you when you are still young you will look back and question where all the time went. Trust me when I say that it all happened for a reason.  You are a good person, you are loved so much, and you will be so happy and content with your life that you will feel like you have won.

I love you little Katie.

Pretty Things

One of the reasons I love to read blogs is how they introduced me to million and one new things.  A while back one of the blogs I read religiously, though honestly it has been so long I could not tell you which one, featured Dogeared Jewelry, and I fell in love.

While I do love the statement necklace craze, I have always been a girl who loves simple jewelry.  Dogeared gives you that, its delicate and personal, and just the perfect addition to any outfit.  But what I find to be the best parts of Dogeared Jewelry are their selection and the cards the jewelry come on.  I am the kind of person who feel that everything needs a name and everything has a meaning.  My mantra in life is “everything happens for a reason”, and the symbols on all of the jewelry and the sayings on the cards let you make a personal connection to your purchase.  I have a few pieces myself and they hold so much meaning in my life, even though I bought them for myself.

lightning necklace

via Dogeared Jewelry, Inc.

MD charm

via Dogeared Jewelry, Inc.

Also, they really do make the best gifts.  I recently sent one to by BFF/cousin for her birthday, but I selected one that wasn’t just pretty but I thought would really bring her something she has been needing over the last few months.  My suggestion is to go check out their website , and see for yourself.

 

(Disclaimer: This is not a sponsored post, but my personal ramblings about products I like.  I have in no way been compensated for my opinions about the products discussed above.)

Finally Friday numero tres…

I’m a bad blogger…I know.

As my WordPress email reminded me this morning, so much has happened in my life since I last wrote. So in keeping with the Friday usual, a list to bring you up to speed.

1. My new job

I left my old job and began my new one.  There are obviously pros and cons to the move.  One massive pro is I am so deeply and passionately in love with the mission of the new organization.  I’ve spent most of my first week at my new desk (not office..sad Katie) reading all about the work the org does and the massive amount of people they help.  warm. and. fuzzies. Now the major con in my book is that I have a serious case of the “New Girls” and I feel awkward and out of place.  At my last job, I was very much the welcoming party, now I’m low man on the totem pole. It is also quite the culture shock.  I now work for the community I envision myself in but in all honesty I am still very much an outsider.  I’m so very hopeful and excited, and I hope making this HUGE change will work out in the end.

2. Charlie

ML and I got a dog.  Her name is Charlie, she is a pointer mix/mutt/rescue dog. She is sweet as can be and we are learning to be a little family.  My two family cats, Holly/Lazer cat/Chubbs and Rory are very slowly adjusting to Charlie.  And yes, those three names are one cat, her name has evolved over time.

Here she is…

charlie1

Finally Friday pt.2

Another week down. It have been kind of crazy with weather and big decision to be made. But here is a look at what I’m looking forward to…

1. Friday Night

I am celebrating because I got the job!!!

So I will be going here..

Mt Washington Tavern

via Mt. Washington Tavern

and eating many of these..

Mt Washington Tavern

via Mt. Washington Tavern

and drink all the wine!

I cannot even begin to stress how much I love this restaurant.  It is my go to for all occassions now, and I would be lying if it wasn’t on my pro/con list for moving to that side of town.

2. No Snowpocalypse

Hey East Coasters, I know you are with me when I say I’m over snow.

shoveling

via Google

3. Nothing

I am so looking forward to spending a weekend doing a whole lot of nothing.

Enjoy you weekend!

 

To: The Hoffman Children

Dear Little Ones,

I am so sorry for your loss, there may be no emptier feeling than losing you parent while you still need them entirely.  I too know what this feels like, addiction is a horrific reality.

I was your age, maybe younger, when I realized my father was an addict.  Alcohol was his drug of choice, and I became acutely aware of why my situation was different from all my friends’. My father was your quintessential Irish charmer, who could tell a good joke or story, dance the night away, and drink you under the table.  He was successful and admired by so many around him, but deep inside he was not happy.  I will never know the truths he told himself when he laid awake at night, or what drove him to drink, but I know that I will never be able to ask him.  Just like you kids, my father died way too soon.

Time will not heal all wounds, and some days may be debilitating, but it will not be all bad.  I have some words of advice that have helped me throughout the past seven years.

Addiction is a disease, not a definition or life sentence.  Yes, we lost our fathers to this disease, but it does not mean you will also fall victim to it.  And if you do find yourself more magnetically drawn to substances to help ease the pain, or make you more creative, or to fit in, know that there is ALWAYS help.  Just like any hereditary disease, addictive traits can be passed down, and you should always keep that in the back of your mind.  I do.

Addiction is a disease, not a definition or life sentence.  This disease should not define your father in life or in death.  He was superior, loving, award-winning, so many wonderful things.  My father too was so much more than his disease, and I like to remind people of all of the good he was and he had in his life.

People may give you sad looks, or whisper behind your back from time to time.  It’s very hard to ignore it completely, or at all.  Every time that happens, think about the good things, but don’t canonize your father.  He was flawed, so was mine, but they were ours, and that is what counts.

Never be ashamed to ask for help.

Al-Anon Family Groups

Nar-Anon Family Groups

For those in the Baltimore area